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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28873035">The Tall man in the restaurant</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AfroDroid/pseuds/AfroDroid'>AfroDroid</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Overwatch (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Character Death, Crack, Crack Fic, F/M, Love, Tragedy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 06:54:39</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>316</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28873035</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AfroDroid/pseuds/AfroDroid</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Balderich von Adler/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>The Tall man in the restaurant</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Feeling lonely and hungry, you put on your outfit consisting entirely of Overwatch merchandise.<br/>
You smile proudly as your Tracer shoes, D.va suit, Zenyatta pants, Soldier 76 Jacket and Reaper mask accompany into the wild world of reality in search of your local Olive Garden.</p>
<p>On the way to comfort and subdue your gamer girl quirks you listen to Lucio’s album Synaesthesia Auditiva on full volume, the sheer power almost bursting your eardrums. But it’s all worth it if it means you won’t turn the next passerby into exp(execution points if you have never gamed undertale). As you peer at your phone’s navigation system you see that your destination has been reached and think to yourself: “Waypoint reached”. A phrase many adventure games use to show one’s progress. As you look at the restaurants, your pussy quivers at the thought of some quality unlimited breadsticks and Chicken Alfredo Pizza Fritta.</p>
<p>As you try to enter the establishment, you're alarmed at the large bald gentleman being thrown out! “DIE KRANKENVERSICHERUNG IST ABGELAUFEN” bursts out of the man’s bearded jaw as his reflecting head shines a holy light directly into your eyes. As the pain subsides you get a closer look and see that this man is none other than the Balderich Overwatch of Eichenwalde, Germany. Promising to buy 50 Loot Boxes to make up for the mistake of not immediately  recognizing his iconic polygon count, you blink your way to him. “Warum werden immer wieder Frauen auf dem modernen Haushalt miteinbezogen?” he says while staring into your gamer eyes. You blush and ask if he’s alright. He nods and stands up, accidentally pulling off your reaper mask in the process. As he looks at you, he blushes. You’re his type.</p>
<p>As you try to help Balderich up he falls on you crushing all of your bones into a fine and snortable powder.</p>
<p>U die lol :)</p>
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